The Joy Of Letting Go

 Did you know parents let go of their children every day, often in ways they don’t realize? Whether your kids are in kindergarten or college, learn how to prepare your hearts for your kids’ independence with Vicki Caruana’s The Joy of Letting Go. The 52 devotional readings within shine a light on all the times readers have loosened their grip on their children and encourages them to continue to let go in life-giving ways. Written by a parenting and education expert, The Joy of Letting Go will comfort and inspire parents in all seasons of parenting.



The Joy of Letting Go: Releasing Your Teen into Real Life in the Big World (David C. Cook, April 2017)

With readings of encouragement and inspirational quotes, this devotional helps parents prepare their hearts for their children’s independence, whether their kids are just starting kindergarten or graduating from college.

Parents let go of their children every day, even in ways they don’t realize. The 52 devotional readings within shine a light on all the times readers have loosened their grip on their children and encourages them to continue to let go in life-giving ways. Written by a parenting and education expert, The Joy of Letting Go will comfort and inspire parents in all seasons of parenting.

Learn more  and purchase a copy.

My Review

My children are 37, 33, 33 and 28. I was that person that, while teaching my children to be extremely self sufficient, I also was THAT MOM. You know the one.

My child was special! Amazing! Going to rule the world!! (Rolling eyes at myself here)

I also was going to do whatever it took to make that happen.

In doing that, I alienated all my kids and made their life more difficult. Not only were they not 100% prepared, no matter what I taught them, and me having nothing (so I thought) to hang my hat on, our lives became very complicated to say the least.

You raise your kids for the result, to leave your home and be out on their own.

You need to give them the self confidence that they can leave your home, and want to come back and more importantly are comfortable coming home to visit.

They want to come back, NOT because they need to, but because they want to.

God gives us resources to work through this season of our lives!
Vicki Caruana puts these resources together in a great devotional called “The Joy of Letting Go: Releasing Your Teen into Real Life In The Big World
“The, very best words we have from God are Phil 4:6-7- Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with Thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus”


There it is. The direction in which we should let our kids go.

From their first little steps, all the way to the college dorm (or first apartment and job etc.)

With prayer and petition, with Thanksgiving.

Oh, how I would live a do-over!!
1st. For the plain and simple reason that I would follow God’s command.
2nd. So that my children could see me and their childhood home in a different frame of mind. By reframing my whole “mother hen” attitude to a #spreadtheirwingsandwnjoytheirflight attitude, I would give my kids the best thing ever.

Truth that Jesus will protect them and truth that they would always find their way back home.

The verse I gave is one that Caruana uses with 52 devotionals to help parents understand that growing up and moving on (in most cases) isn’t optional, it is the way God intended life to be.

You can purchase The Joy of Letting Go  here at the bottom of the information

Dr. VicVCaruana-435ki Caruana is the author of 20 books and the blog Apples & Chalkdust—named after her bestselling book that has touched the lives of a million educators around the world. Caruana is one of four parenting experts on “Starting Points,” Focus on the Family’s parenting DVD series. Formerly a public school teacher and a homeschooling mom, Vicki is now an assistant professor of education at Mount Saint Mary College in New York. She lives with her station wagon loving husband, Chip, in Newburgh, New York and has two grown sons in Colorado Springs.

You can find Vicki at this blog
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An Open Palm – The Transition into Adulthood for a Mom and her Sailor

This was copied from NavyForMoms And while I’ve Linked back to it, you probably can’t get to it, unless you are a member.  But I have given credit to the owner of it.  I did NOT write it. ~ Laura

Ladies-this is a Blog I originally wrote back in August ’08 when my son had finished BC and was in the first few weeks of “A” school, the

second stage of his Navy journey. I’m proud to report that he graduated -with distinction -and is well on his way to pursuing the rest of his dreams. :)Hope my reflections are helpful to you. This is a turn on the Roller Coaster that can leave a Mom breathless and a little nauseated at times, but often it’s quite exhilerating!:-) God Bless!

One of the hardest things as a Mom is knowing when to release your grasp and let your child spread his wings. From the moment they arrive, we snuggle them close, nurse them, protect them fiercely, intercede, advocate, sacrifice and generally go over the top to make sure they have everything they need to be happy, safe and successful. It is not a job for the faint of heart. Often, we find ourselves holding onto them with clenched fists, the world beyond our safe harbor can be such a cruel and scary place. It’s natural to want to close ranks around them and keep them in, to want them to stay where we can continue to watch over them and control what affects them. Especially if you are not sure if they know what they are doing.

I remember when my son was about 15, he was obsessed with dying his hair blond. I knew of course, that it would look awful and streaky in his thick dark hair, but he was determined! Guess I should be thankful he wasn’t fixed on piercing something or a tattoo (both of which he did in college later, go figure!) but I was the Mom and I was equally determined it wasn’t going to be. So, I simply outsmarted and out waited him… I gave my permission on the condition that he let my Uncle who is a hairstylist do it (who lived 300 miles away, guess how many times a year we saw him) and that he wait until we had our family portrait done. Guess how long it took for that to happen?! Yep, until the desire faded. =) Diabolically sneaky and underhanded I know, but sometimes a

moms gotta do what a moms gotta do…what amazes me is that even though he was persistent, he never caught on or raised a huge stink.! He’s very smart and wasn’t one to disobey, suppose he figured it wasn’t worth the fight. [the Mom in me just hopes it’s because he realized how incredibly wise I was! =)

But at some point, that clenched fist must become an open palm, a place to receive whatever your fledgling adult offers and a launching pad for them into the world beyond, sometimes into the unknown. This is especially so when your precious offspring decides to join the Military! The launching process is suddenly accelerated and even the most “adjusted and open minded” Moms can be thrown for a loop! I know I was, and since I did not have any prior military experience or history of service on my side of the family, I was probably not as open minded as some. I was concerned, intrigued and downright scared. Still, I knew this one I could not outthink, outsmart or outwait him on. It was going

to happen, one way or another. He’d been living on his own for two

years; seeking my/our blessing and understanding was a loving,

honorable courtesy on his part. I have always been a roll up my sleeves and get involved in the process kind of person, so I set about to educate myself (hubby was on board already) and then had a nice long chat with his recruiter. Poor guy! I didn’t mince words or spare his feelings, I asked the tough questions and expected honest, informative answers. This was the only way I could come to terms with and get a handle on my son’s choice.

I have spent countless hours in the bleachers at school events,

cheering him on, I wasn’t going to disappear now. I knew that he would still need my support and encouragement, just in a different way. This is what Moms do. The trick is to find a way to do it in a way that is not intrusive or obstructive and allows them to slide into the role of grown up seamlessly. A tall order for sure, one that takes dying to my own selfish needs to hang on, to smother, to delay the inevitable, but one that has immense rewards. My son called from Hospital Corpsman “A”school the other day. He’s really enjoying the process of learning to be a Medic, something we never anticipated! The little boy I used to protect and whose wounds I used to tend, has now assumed the role of Protector and Healer. He’s also been impressed at how much I’ve learned since being on N4M’s! He told a fellow classmate (who’s Mom is also on N4M) “I think my mom knows more about the Navy than I do!” 🙂 He calls

now to ask me to look things up and find out information for him, he calls to keep me up to date, he calls because he knows I will swallow my fears and listen, pray, support and encourage him no matter what. He calls because he know that like the God who created him, I love him unconditionally. I was the first person he told that he’d been asked to be Platoon Leader for his class. He was weighing it out and asked for (needed) my input. That is my role now, still nurturer, cheerleader and prayer warrior, but now reflective sounding board and trusted adviser, always and forever Mom.

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